Breast Reduction

I am a male to female transsexual who failed once with transition and would like to again?

I tried to transition on the job but my employer said no if I wanted to retire. I had been female hormones several years and had to quit hormones and have breast reduction surgery. I still feel like a woman and have wanted to be one even without hormones

Public Comments

1. dude your problem is mental
2. Then do it. Don't let some uninformed employer tell you who you are; be yourself. There will always be SOMEONE who can't accept you, or what you're going through, but you can't live your life according to someone else's perception of who you should be. If your employer can't handle that, maybe you're in the wrong job.
3. That's really tough... First of all, I'm positive that's discrimination. Big no no for your employer. Maybe inquire about a change in jobs within the company. If you were able to take a short leave of absence, transition and come back into a different part of the company where less people know you, it might be easier for them and you. People can be critical to the point of being stupid. Get your human resources dept involved if you think your employer is threatening your job security over your sexual preference.
4. Transgender issues are very complicated no matter what standpoint you care to evaluate them from. You post that you still feel like a female even without using the necessary hormones (premdominately estrogen/progesterone combination) to achieve more "feminine" characteristics. This statement should have also been true before your initialing attempting a transition. I assume you convinced a doctor this was the case or you would not have been prescribed the hormones. If you are procuring and using the hormones illegally you are doing a very dangerous thing; maintaining a transgendered state must be supervised by an MD who is qualified to handle this form of medicine. Typically the evaluation and the prescription for transgender cases are handled by a psychiatrist. What is very striking about your post is you are allowing your employer to threaten your employment by sexually discriminating against you (the covert message being if you continue with a change of an outward change of gender you will lose everything you have invested towards a retirement income from this company). I can certainly understand your valuing financial security and the reluctance to potentially forfeit your job if you continue against his wishes. The question becomes could you successfully sue him and the company if you were released from your position. The odds of that are very small. They would not act in a way which would enable you to prove that was the reason for your being fired. They would find other reasons or if you work in a "right to work" state, they do not need a reason to release you. You didn't state how long it would be before you could take early retirement from this company and then go secure another position where undergoing the transition would be possible. What I do know is that the oldest recorded male to transition to the female gender was in his 80s when he elected to make the change. His decision was to basically spend the remaining years of his life as he had always wanted to: with his body reflecting his inward female sexual recognition. Based on that, if you believe that there is some predetermined age at which you can no longer transition then understand that is a misconception. I see a nationally recognized expert in transgender issues for a different medical problem. It is through this doctor that I have acquired the knowledge I do possess about it. Although I have no mismatch between gender and outward physiotype, I can certainly imagine the discordance and pain which it causes. Apart from waiting until you can leave this company with your retirement intact, the only other practical recourse I see is leaving the company to start the change and relinguishing any claim on the financial stability a retirement income would provide. Undergoing a transgender change is a very expensive process. Unless you already possess a great deal of wealth (I sense you don't or you would not express concern about retirement), then giving up the financial security you have achieved so far is probably going to negatively impact your ability to undergo the change and maintain it once done. You are certainly faced with a difficult decision and I do not see any middle ground afforded you. The only other option which might potentially exist is being transferred to another department where the manager was at least tolerant, if not sympathetic of your issues and problems. Cindy H
5. There are lots of employers in the world. You only get one chance to be alive. It can be hard to find employment as a trans person, but you can do it. Be cautious, don't leave yourself destitute, but don't let fear of temporary unemployment stop you from transitioning forever.
6. You know who you are and instinctively what makes you happy. If you are indeed a transsexual you know what will bring you happiness, living like a woman. Don't´forget later you begin less positive effects have the hormone therapy!!! Lots of kisses and best wishes!!!